I've Bought Four Men Patriots Jerseys, and Here's What Actually Matters Before You Pick One

My first men Patriots jersey arrived in 2014 — a navy Nike Game 12 in size large, a birthday gift from my wife. I wore it to a bar in Providence for the AFC title game and got wing sauce on the front numbers before halftime. That thing has survived a lot of bad decisions since, including three more jerseys.

The mistakes I made are the same ones I watch friends make every September. It usually comes down to buying the wrong tier or the wrong size, because the photos on a product page tell you almost nothing about how a jersey actually sits on your shoulders.

Nike builds three levels, and they feel nothing alike once they're out of the bag:

• Game — screen-printed numbers and letters, light polyester, boxy through the chest. The stadium standard.
• Limited — stitched numbers, a slightly trimmer cut, a little more weight in the fabric.
• Elite — the on-field version. Heavier, tighter through the shoulders, stretch panels, and roughly three times the price of a Game jersey.

If you just want something to wear on Sundays, Game is honestly fine. Mine has been washed dozens of times and the print still looks okay from three feet away.

Sizing is where people get burned. Game and Limited run roomy and long — if you're between sizes and want a fitted look, size down. Elite is the opposite: the shoulders are cut tight, so most guys go up one. I'm 5'10" and about 185, and a medium Game fits over a t-shirt with room to spare, while a medium Elite feels like a compression top. Planning to layer a hoodie underneath in December? Stay true to size or bump up.

Length is its own headache. These things are cut to fit over shoulder pads, so they hang low on normal humans. Untucked over jeans is the move. Some guys get them hemmed, and I get it.

Stitched numbers carry a little weight, which is great until you're sitting in a hot car in July. Screen print breathes better but will crack eventually if you keep feeding it to the dryer. Heat is the enemy either way, and that goes double for anything with a nameplate.

Care itself is simple, and most people ignore it anyway. Cold water, inside out, hang dry. No fabric softener. Keep an iron nowhere near the numbers — one touch and a stitched number goes permanently shiny.

On the name on the back, the safe play is a retired legend. Brady, Gronk, Edelman, or a Bruschi or Wilfork if you want something you won't see on ten other guys at the bar. Current-roster jerseys are a gamble every March, and I'd hold off on customizing a rookie until he's signed a second contract. I say that as someone who owns a jersey he'd rather not discuss.

The red Pat Patriot throwbacks deserve their own mention. They look better in person than on a screen, and the white version is quietly the sharper of the two.

Buying as a gift and don't know the size? That's the one thing you can't guess. A jersey that doesn't fit is a wall hanging with a price tag. Ask, or stick to a shop with a forgiving return window.

Anyway, that's the short version of what I tell friends: I've bought four men Patriots jerseys, and here's what actually matters before you pick one — get the tier right, get the size right, then pick a name you'll still be happy about in five years. Everything else is just fabric.